Archive for the ‘traveler in other people’s reality’ Tag

I Remain A Traveler In Other People’s Reality   14 comments

Kenne Self-protrate art blogSelf-portrait 

Invoking the Full Meaning of Life

How best to express sharing new life,
when each moment deserves its own face.

What seems apropos for the moment,
when the next moment fosters a new experience.

Is it in a number?

The number of days?
The number of thoughts?
The number of heartbeats?
The number of turns?
The number of prayers?

. . . you can count the ways,
only to still not know life’s score.

Is it in a word?

Loving?
Caring?
Sharing?
Giving?
Sheltering?

Words to communicate thoughts and feelings
when manifested in knowledge and experience.

Or, is it in art?

Transforming thought,
expressing feeling,
experiencing emotions and
the desire to evoke life,
even when distance
appears to separate a lifelong bond.

I wrote this in the 1990s. Much has changed since then, retirement and moving 1,000 miles from where we had spent 25 years, putting distance between bonds. In the three years since moving, we have watched the bonds appear to drift away, causing me to question the desire to evoke life, even when distance can’t separate a lifelong bond. 

We had moved to the Sonoran desert with the illusion that friends and family would be beating a path to our new home in the desert southwest — not such luck. We try staying in touch through social media, often questioning whether the bonds were ever real — confirming that we remain tourists in other people’s reality.

The other day I read a posting by blogger, Old Jules, “These damned ego-warts.

Old Jules is a 70-year-old hermit, living with three cats somewhere in the Texas Hill Country and writing a blog I enjoy reading from time to time. Old Jules has concluded that he has spent over a third of his life “being insignificant in the lives of others.” 

In 1992, after 25 years of marriage and a career of 20 years, he began a new career and life in Santa Fe. 

All secure in the knowledge the extended family and friends remaining behind were part of my life in which I’d been and remained, important.”

Over time he concluded it was all an illusion. 

“Kids, young adult nephews, and nieces  I’d coddled and bounced on my knee pealed out of my life-like layers of an onion.  Most I never heard from again.”

He began to realize that he was merely tolerated, “. . . a piece of furniture in their lives.”  

Over time he rebuilt his life with a more potent dose of skepticism concerning his own worth and place in the lives of others, which resulted in his becoming a hermit.  

“I no longer assume I’m important in the lives of other human beings and get my satisfaction in knowing I’m at least relevant to the cats.  

Because cats, though sometimes dishonest, aren’t capable of the depth and duration of dishonesty humans indulge regularly.”

Old Jules has come to believe, “. . . that life is entirely too important and too short to be wasted in insignificance.”

His new awareness of life is now in teaspoon measurements, “. . . measured in contracts with cats not equipped to lie. A determination in the direction of significance measured in teaspoons of reality, 

as opposed to 55-gallon drums of  dishonesty and self-delusion.”

“Teaspoons, I find, don’t spill away as much life in the discovery
when they’re found to be just another ego-wart of pride and self-importance.”

Kika_20120101_1163 blog II

Bonds, illusion or not, have difficulty being when the moments are separated by time and distance, becoming gleams of light, for an instant, in the long night.

I understand from where Old Jules is coming and feel his disillusionment. There is, however, a binding force that comes from a homesick longing to be whole, to have completion as Plato described in the myth of the human halves passionately striving towards one. Like all mythical totalities, humans are subject to the triple dramaturgical rhythm of primal completeness, separation catastrophe, and restoration. The most significant effect of attraction takes place between the second and third acts of life’s drama. This is where I find myself today — maybe this is also where Old Jules is. I am learning to understand myself from a new divide, one half experienced, the other inexperienced — in such a way that I’m learning to understand myself in new ways.

But then, there are the darn cats!

Kika, what do you think?

kenne

“Have you not done tormenting me with your accursed time!
It’s abominable! When! When!
One day,
is that not enough for you,
one day he went dumb,
one day I went blind,
one day we’ll go deaf,
one day we were born,
one day we shall die,
the same day,
the same second,
is that not enough for you?

They give birth astride of a grave,
the light gleams an instant,
then it’s night once more.”

— Samuel Beckett, Waiting for Godot

Seattle Lummi Island & Vancouver_Stacked Rocks_0150 II art II blogImages by kenne

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. . . guilty   Leave a comment

Aggression — Image by kenne

(This image and poem were first posted, December 2007 on my Yahoo 360 blog. With this reposting, I’m also introducing a new blog, “A Traveler in Other People’s Reality,” which will only contain my photography, art, and poetry. To date, it has 105 reposting. http:inotherpeoplesreality.wordpress.com )

. . . guilty.

Embracing reason
Sharing time
Finding reality
Existing in space
For these things I am . . .

Loving the underdog
Catching the moment
Believing others’ lies
Crying alone
For these things I am . . .

Watching sunsets
Experiencing truth
Awakening before dawn
Catching the light
For these things I am . . .

Taking things apart
Looking for curves
Believing in art
Believing in you
For these things I am . . .

Caring about life
Climbing trees
Walking in pastures
Keeping stray dogs
For these things I am . . .

Believing in Hobbits
Flying the redeye
Losing my head
Expressing anger
For these things I am . . .

Sharing expectations
Learning from asking
Solving problems
Admiring thought
For these things I am . . .

Talking to plants
Understanding cats
Swimming nude
Experiencing love
For these things I am . . .

Improvising life
Rejecting suppression
Questioning rules
Asking, “Why?”
For these things I am . . .

Making mistakes
Forgiving myself
Taking offense
Forgiving others
For these things I am . . .

Listening in silence
Always learning
Making things happen
Giving respect
For these things I am . . .

Being timid
Becoming self-assured
Being assertive
Being misunderstood
For these things I am . . .

Feeling the Blues
Embracing imagination
Overcoming mediocrity
Expressing gratitude
For these things I am . . .

Assessing existence
Separating the noise
Being in love
Going crazy
For these things I am . . . guilty.

— kenne

Another Entry As A Traveler In Other People’s Reality   Leave a comment

2779608425_0fcb5a793ereworAs a web traveler I enjoy traveling in other people’s reality. One such reality is that of Abbe. I can’t help but love her reality. She is so insightful. I love her images and reading her writing.

kenne

Photo Source: http://abberantverse.wordpress.com/2009/10/12/green-and-slimy-the-turtles-revenge/

Posted October 14, 2009 by kenneturner in Art, Photography, Poetry

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